Eager Woman Wants to Request Song But Can’t Remember Title or Artist

by | Oct 18, 2019 | Humor

“Y’know it’s that song? By that guy? I know you guys know it!”

Ashley was normally pretty reserved, but she had several cosmos in her and was feeling brazen. “I’m gonna go request a song!” she informed the rest of the bachelorette party. “Oooo oooo,” blurted the bride-to-be’s trashy cousin Melissa. “Make ’em play that song we heard at the Waffle House!” 

“I LOVE that song!” exclaimed Ashley.

Local cover band Wheels of Tire was well into its second set of 90’s rock tunes when singer Grayson Richard noticed the bridal party. 

“Yeah man…I saw this group of chicks. They were a’ight.”

Ashley was all set to approach the stage when she was intercepted by passing a shot girl. “Hey everybody!” she shouted to her posse. “Let’s do some SHOTS!!”

As tooters were passed out to the girls, bride’s maid Nancy poked Ashley hard between the boobs. “That bass player was just eyeing you up and down, dude. You should totally go talk to him!”

“Yepummkay. I’m unna do ziss now,” Ashley slurred.

Dollar bill in hand, Ashley gracefully stumbled up to the stage where the band was tearing it up mid-song.

“Heyyyy!!” shouted Ashley. “Can you?………Heyyyyy!!” 

The band barely noticed the party girl as they were all digging into “Flanger” Phil Dodson’s killer guitar solo.

“I mean, nobody else dares to use a flange pedal for most solos,” drummer Mack Tucker later admitted. “but fuckin’ Phil feels it!”

While the song was still going, Ashley was trying to get bass player Nick Scott’s attention, but he never opened his eyes. “Dafuq is up wiff this guy?” Ashley thought to herself as she sucked her straw and swayed out of time to the music.

When the song was finally over, Ashley knew she had her chance.

“Do you guys take requests?” limply waving her one spot.

“Sure,” Scott half-heartedly replied. “What do you want to hear?”

Panic struck poor Ashley at that very moment.

“Oh shit…I can’t…I don’t remember the name. It’s that song by that guy. Y’know it goes da da da bom bom, da da da bom bom. You know that one, right?”

“Ummm, no,” responded Scott.

“Come onnnnn!” Ashley insisted. “You haafff to play it! It’s my JAM” while teasing her dollar above the tip jar.

“If you can get us a name, then maybe,” Scott quickly dismissed as the next song was being counted in.

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